Purpose: of Life, of Existence

“Do we really need a purpose to do something?”
This question is answer to the very existence of mine. If there is no purpose, I might not breathe even. Everything, every single entity around me is encircled within the word Purpose.
Once I had a friend, with whom I usually had conversation regarding Software Technology, as he was working with a major IT firm. One day he told me that he is writing a novel. I was not amazed with his words, because I knew he is pretty much of a wordsmith, who can craft beautiful sentences out of simple incidents, and had a good command over language. But still, I asked him “Do you have a purpose?” 
Question was simple. And certainly it still is one of the most common questions that I still ask. 
He replied, “Do I need one?” making it simpler than ever.
I don’t remember when this conversation did take place, but those were the days when Orkut used to be the most happening place.  With time, and his success we drifted apart, he became a big celebrity and I kept a distance to make sure that I won’t hurt his image in his fans. Until one day I saw his message on my mailbox.  It read, 
Hi,
I hope you remember me. I haven’t heard from you since quite a long time. Hope you are doing well.  You might know, that I wrote the novel that once I discussed with you, and a few more. I’m sure you must have read it. Would love to know what you think about it.
You must be wondering why I appeared out of nowhere and asking about it today. It’s been years we discussed about it, and certainly I couldn’t stay in touch with you due to multiple reasons that you understand well. What I don’t understand is why you never contacted. We were more than Orkut Friends, aren’t we? 
We need to meet and sort it out ASAP! Before that, I need to tell you why I thought of you. 
Yesterday, when I was writing an article, my wife (Oh Yes, I got married recently!) asked me “Why do you write?” with a generous curiosity.  She further asked “Do you have a purpose?” She just wanted to know why I am always engrossed in writing. 
I’m sure she is nowhere connected to you, nor I told her about you, but she asked it in the same way as you did years ago. When was that? 2007? Or 2008? I don’t remember clearly.  And it reminded me of you. And your question of Purpose.  I hadn’t had the answer then, but now I have.
And that’s the reason why I searched for you in my mailing contact and thought of sharing my reasons with you. 
Yes, I have a purpose. Then, it was escaping the bitterness of reality, and now it is to capture the beauty of life. 
I write because I write about my own life. Every day there would be another novel in the stands, but none of them will have my story in them. I might not be an extraordinary writer, but I can shape my thoughts to give them a life, that is beyond the pages of my novels, and stays in the hearts of my readers
 I write because that’s all I know. I wrote codes which had no life. Now I am writing novels, that has my own life. How can I stay away from my own life? 
I write because the purpose of reading and writing is to sustain the sense of being alive and connected to your soul makes you feel something that is beyond explain. It is my way to resist the existential loneliness that creeps up in the nights and takes away my sleep.  When I am writing, there is no numbness. You should try that too.
I thought of quitting from writing many a times, but every time something stopped me. And I realized there really is always a greater purpose of everything that you do. Didn’t you say that before? 
You know, I am feeling relieved after writing it all. I never thought I was carrying such a burden in my heart since a long time. I don’t know when you will see this mail, or reply to it, but I will wait for your reply. There’s a lot to catch up. 
Did you get married? Or still believe in ‘Do se bhale Ek’, remember that joke?  Your bhabhi is excited to meet you, and seems more than me she is happy to find you back.
 I have your number, but not sure if it is still working or not. I called up, but no one picked it.  Send me your number, and if possible we might catch up in a video call. What say? 
Regards,
Your Once Purposeless Friend. :)

Comments

  1. I frequently wonder why I am torturing myself with the pressure of trying to write. I lead a pretty full life and don't really need to write to make myself feel complete. I'm not even a very good writer. Like I told you before, every time I read a really good book, I wish I had written it. That's my pupose.

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