It's not a Love Story:Chapter 7: It’s not the end, It’s a new beginning
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I always thought loneliness is a hallucination which I will never feel but I proved wrong. I never felt lonelier than I felt that night. I had no one with whom I can share my feelings; I wasn’t even talking to myself.
“Hi Anjit, how are you feeling now?” Dr. Bhatnagar’s voice brought me back to reality.
“You okay?” He asked when I didn’t answer.
“Hmm” I answered in very low voice.
“Ansh, I am like your elder brother if not brother you can consider me as your friend. I know what are feeling now and I very well know how does it feels. You can talk to me” I guess Riddhi told him about my situation hence he was trying to make things normal for me.
“What do you think Dr. Shashank; you might be thinking that I am a dumb guy, who thinks that a girl can love him only because he loves her?” I asked.
“No I don’t think so, because as far as I know you waited till now and you can’t fall in love unless you want to” He replied.
“You know I am not desperate to be in love. First time in life someone made me forget about the loneliness inside me and her absence, even for a while, is making me feel like a zombie.
I very well know the difference between attraction and affection. I never attracted to anyone, not even had crush on any, I know its Love that I am feeling for her. But my mistake is Loving someone is not everything, you need to know if they love you or not, you need to make them love you back, and that’s the irony that she doesn’t loves me at all” and I said it all at once.
Men don’t cry but lovers do cry and I really don’t need to tell why and when, they just cry as I was crying in front of Dr. Shashank. He might never have imagined seeing someone, who is supposed to be last hopes of many, crying on his own shattered love story.
“Sometimes it’s not what we want, it’s what we deserve, and I know you deserve far better, and it’s not the end. You very well know that someone….”
“Somewhere is waiting specially for you…. And I don’t give a shit to that someone, I don’t need anyone, I just want her to love me too, that’s it…” anger could be felt in my voice as I was struggling hard not to lose my temper.
“I’ll be okay, don’t worry, it will be great if you’ll leave me alone for some time, Thank You” even though it was rude but he understood it wasn’t intentional.
“Okay, I’ll get back to you soon, take care” and he stood up to leave.
“Can you turn that radio off? It’s damn irritating” I asked.
“Sorry I can’t, its centralized, will be off at 11” he replied.
“Okay” I said and he left.
“This is Red Fm 93.5, and you are with yours Shreya and we have a caller with us, let’s see who called us on Love Connect…. HELLO!” RJ Shreya’s familiar voice broke my thoughts which were making me hate myself from a long, and I shifted my attention towards radio.
“HI Shreya, its Naina here” and I almost forgot to breathe as I heard the voice. Yes it’s Her! But look at that girl, here I am dying to hear her voice but she can’t call me. She is calling on radio to request songs for his loves. Great! I hate you Naina…
“Hi Naina, how are you?” RJ Shreya asked.
“She is great Shreya, its best day of her life, she just broke my heart. She must be on cloud 9, 10 may be on 11” I said if she is really listening.
“Hmm I am just okay” she replied in a sad tome which I completely missed.
“But you are not sounding so Naina, tell me what happened, you can tell me” Shreya said.
“I am confused actually. There is a guy who loves me, I know that. But I just met him a day ago and I don’t know if it’s enough to be in love with someone. I don’t even know if I love him or not. I am totally confused” She replied with sadness which I felt this time.
“awww so sweet baby, so it’s Love at first sight hmmm. I will suggest you to close your eyes for a while, listen to the track that I am going to play only for you, and after that think of the most beautiful place on earth, and imagine as if someone is holding your hand, and if you see him, HE is the ONE for you” Shreya sounded as happy as she always sounds.
“Hmm okay as you say, I just want to know it…” she replied with a lot of anxiety.
What did she just said??
Is she talking about me??
Damn why there is no rewind button on radio!!
What if she won’t see me holding her hand!!
What to do?? And I was becoming impatient with each passing second.
“So here is the special song only for you Naina, Bin tere from the movie I hate Love Story, but I loooooove love stories…
If you have any request, confusion, problem, want to say something to someone, or even want to propose anyone, call me on ‘Love Connects’, you know the number?? Its 4000935 till than Bajatey raho….” And Bin tere Reprise started.
When it started I recalled it all started with Bin Tere Regular Version and I won’t let it end with the Sad Reprise version. And I picked my cell and dialed 4000935
“Hello Red Fm, its Shreya” she picked after a long ring.
“Hi Shreya Its Anjit” I replied.
“Hey Ansh!! It’s been a real long I heard from you! How are you? Where are you? You listened to my show?” she excitedly asked.
“Yeah real long, almost 3 years by now, I am still here, but busy with MBA and other stuffs, hardly have time for radio. But right now I am listening to your show and thought of dropping a call” I tried sounding at least normal.
“How is it? However we still miss you here, even some old listener often ask for you. Any plans of coming back?” she asked.
“No plans Shreya, You know the reason why I left, and you are already doing Great! So no chance of comeback at all” I had no idea what I was saying but I was trying to be as normal as I can.
“So want to throw any song request?” She asked as she realized that the song is about to end.
“I need a favor from you Shreya, can you give me two slots?” I asked without telling her the reason.
“What! Two Slots! But why?” she asked in surprise as two slots are equal to 15 minutes and which really a BIG deal.
“Can you Shreya? It’s a question of my life, I would never had asked you If I had any other option” and I explained her everything while she played another track in continuity.
And after thinking for a while she replied “Okay but I am doing it only for you, if anything will happen, responsibility will be yours okay…”
“I will” I assured.
“Okay, we will be on AIR in 3…2…1… ON”
“Hey everyone you have tuned the no. 1 station of the country Red Fm…. And this is yours Shreya and on your favorite show Love connects. And guess what! Who is on call! Ex. Host of Love Connects!! Yes you guessed it right RJ ANSH....”
“Hi Ansh how are you??”
“Hi Shreya I am fine, and want to tell everyone that I really miss you all a lot” I replied while whole city listened to me, especially Naina.
“So tell me Ansh what made you to call on Love Connects?” She asked, not to mention without any script.
“What else than love can make someone call on ‘Love Connect’ Shreya? Actually I want to let someone know what my heart wants to tell her. I want her to feel what I am feeling now” I replied while I felt the nervousness to speak on radio for the first time.
“Awwww so sweet and so so romantic…. So you are going to propose her tonight?” She asked.
“Yep Shreya, Right here, Right now, I want everyone to be witness my first Love however by listening. I want everyone to know how doses love Sounds” I started feeling even more anxious.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes while Shreya played a soft piano instrumental, which was signal for me to start.
Naina I know you are listening,
I wanted to tell it all when you came to see me,
But I just wanted to ensure that you must feel the same,
Because loving you is not everything, I want you to love me too...
I dreamt of you all my life,
Waited for the moment when you’ll come in my life,
When you walked in that day,
I realized I am still alive,
I always thought I will never fall in love,
But the moment I saw you, I realized you are the one,
Without you I lived alone,
If you won’t be with me I can’t live anymore…
I want you to embellish my dreams,
I want you to cherish my life,
I don’t know why I love you,
But I know I love only YOU….
I want you to live with me,
I want you to be mine…
I don’t want to promise anything to you,
Because I know I will love you forever,
With you I can stay,
But without you I will die every day,
Will you stay with me?
Will you be mine….Just mine?
I love you from my soul…
Tell me Naina do you love me too??
Naina Do you love me too??.....
The music was still playing while I was feeling like I am lost. I wanted her to tell me what she felt about it. If she can’t accept then she can tell me that she hates me and I heard
“Yes I do, I really do, I love you”
Yes she accepted that she loves me too…and I am on cloud 9, 10 may be 11!!
At time, when you feel so blue you actually miss the fact that sometimes good things happen, especially when you have good people around you. Shreya called her and convinced her to come ON AIR and she made our love story to be remembered forever.
I really feel that Love is magical, because it shows you every emotion, brings people close and make them be together forever.
But it’s not the end of my love story; it’s actually a new beginning J
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